Got the Katanas out

Despite the difficulties I’m going through with the PTSD right now, I did manage to climb for a second day in a row this morning. It felt great! I got my La Sportiva Katanas out and climbed in them this morning. I had forgotten what a great all-around climbing shoe they are, and how well I had them broken in! My Katanas were my first real pair of serious climbing shoes when I began climbing. I started out with a pair of La Sportiva TC Pros for the ankle support because I had been wearing an immobilizing ankle brace for 16 years. My ankle was very weak. The TC Pros got me started and my ankle gradually became stronger. I wore my ankle brace with my Katanas initially, but then one day I decided to see what would happen if I climbed without the brace on. It was shaky and unstable at first, but as I climbed in my Katanas without the brace, I noticed a change over the next few weeks. My ankle —the ankle that multiple surgeons had written off as useless to me for any purpose, especially something as strenuous and balance-dependent as rock climbing — was capable of very technical footwork! I have always prided myself on my footwork, and one of the reasons why is exactly that — everyone had given up. Well, almost everyone. My current psychiatrist, who knew about my ankle and its history, was the one who got me into rock climbing! He believed! Even I myself had stopped believing…but the Doc knew better. That gave me something invaluable — HOPE.

I’m going through a Major Depressive Episode right now, and when I met with the Doc earlier today, I didn’t have a lot of hope. Okay, I had no hope. He believed, though. And that gives me that invaluable hope — that one tiny ember to blow on and turn back into a raging fire. I’m going to be okay. I know that. I have that hope within me. I just had to be reminded…

My point is that everyone needs reminded of that hope now and again, no matter what their situation in life. So be a friend and help them blow on that one tiny ember they have left!

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