Rejection

Rejection.  It does not feel very good at all.  My application for admission to the Master of Fine Arts in Creative Writing Program at Southern New Hampshire University was denied this morning.  I am still going ahead with the Master of Arts in English and Creative Writing Program that I did gain admission to, which begins 22 Jun 2020.  All is not lost.  It is not like I cannot learn from the program that I have been accepted to, and I can always use the experience that I gain through this program of study to apply for the MFA again at a later date.  It might even work out better that way.  Who knows!  I need to order my class materials for my first class soon, though.  I e-mailed my advisors to make them aware of the new development in my program of study (back to the original plan, mainly) so that they can get everything squared away and I can get going on prepping for this adventure.  I am excited about the MA program, and I must say that I was a bit intimidated by the MFA program, so maybe it is better that I get my feet wet in the MA program first, anyway.  That is the way I am going to look at it, at least.  I do not need to feel any more depressed or down than I already do.  I am having a hard time with my mental illness lately and I keep my head above water by doing the “homework” that the Doc gives me every week.  I have no doubt that I will someday, if I wish, gain admission to the MFA program.  It will just take a bit of time and some experience.  What I need is a track record with this school, more information about what they are looking for in a candidate, and a better set of credentials.  The MA classes will give me all that I need to fulfill those criteria.  I must say that I am still disappointed…. I had better get used to rejection as a writer, though.  My impression is that it happens all the time.

I just finished taking notes on all 19 lessons of Neil Gaiman’s online Master Class on Storytelling this morning as well.  The way Gaiman teaches the classes genuinely makes you feel like it is something that I can do and that you can do if you are serious about writing.  I love the feeling of being able to do something new and something that I can get excited about because I get to use my imagination and creativity.  I get to make something mine and have my very own story or comic or whatever I happen to write, illustrate, or create in general.  I find it rather ironic that the morning that I finish taking notes on Gaiman’s class is the same morning that I find out about my rejection by the Assistant Dean of the MFA in Creative Writing admissions office.  Oh, well.  It just means that I have to get better at writing.  I have written millions — literally millions — of words.  I just have not written the right words in the right order on the same page, yet.  That will come with time…and a few million more words, I am sure.