An odd time in my life

Here I am, 39 years old, married for the second (and last) time, living between my apartment in the city and my mom’s house in a rural town (having lost my dad to renal failure at age 74 the day before Easter of this year), a permanently and totally disabled Veteran learning Latin, a convert to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, sick with some sort of mystery ailment, a rock climber, a blogger, and an aspiring writer of short fiction.  And it’s Sunday.  Did I mention it’s Sunday?  It’s Sunday.  I’m up early seeing if my mystery illness is under control yet today, drinking sparkling mineral water and processing the dreams I awoke from at around 0500 hrs this morning (quite a late start for me, actually).  I’ve got my light therapy lamp blazing and am half-blind, but it’s supposed to help with whatever might ail you, so more power to it!  What an odd time in my life!

I’m a year short of fourscore, having an age crisis about being 39 years old, and lamenting (ie. still looking in the rear-view mirror of my life) about all the things that have gone wrong.  Granted, PTSD doesn’t make that any easier to shake, but I need to focus on what I’m going to do with the rest of my life, because I’m quite tired of being this incredibly miserable all the time!  So I didn’t make a career of the military.  Not my fault.  So I didn’t make it into medical school.  Not meant to be.  I can, however, rock climb and write.  I blog.  I provide entertainment.  I can turn that skill into a writing career, and perhaps branch out into vlogging as well.  Don’t worry, I won’t stop blogging.  Blogging is fun because I have someone to talk to, get feedback from, inform, make laugh, and get things off my chest to.  And I don’t have to stick to one subject.  I can post several blog entries per day, or if I’m not able to (which I really hate), I can skip a day.  I do like to be consistent and let you, my readers, know I’m still alive each day and give you something new to think about or chew on or just to know at least once a day.  Right now, I take life one day at a time.  I don’t really plan the future.  And for now, that suits me.  It may always suit me, or I may want more of a long-term plan someday, but not today.  Today I’m content with today.  I don’t even know what I’m going to do today!  My general outline of a plan is to recover from yesterday’s health debacle and rest.  Oh, an say hello to all of you!  Hello!  I hope you have a great day!  More later…maybe.  Not a guarantee, but I’ll try.  Updates pending…