I was talking to a friend of mine yesterday who happens to be a fast food restaurant manager. He just hired a new fellow who has a tremor that he said wouldn’t be a problem. It turns out that it’s a huge problem! The poor guy can’t even put his gloves on or wrap a sandwich! Those are the most basic tasks, other than dish-washing, that you can ask a person to do!!! Now, being disabled myself, I don’t have anything against disabled folks. You do have to be able to do the job, though. I spent 16 years preparing to become a doctor and guess what? I decided, and it was pointed out to me by my doctor friends and confidants, that I wasn’t going to be able to handle the stress with my severe and chronic PTSD. More than that, even though it was a dream I’d had and prepared for over many years (half of my life), I wasn’t going to be happy. At first, I took that as an epic failure in my life – mostly a failure of my own character and value as a human being. My doctor spent a very long and intense two years of convincing me that I had intrinsic value and that it wasn’t dependent upon what I did.
I thought of this as my manager friend told me that this fellow with the tremor wanted to have his own food truck someday. That is likely never going to happen unless this guy gets the tremor seriously under control! My understanding is that it is already as good as it’s going to get. I felt for my friend, who is feeling badly about it and is going to have to talk to HR, and the fellow with the tremor, whose dream may not be realistic. My manager friend did say, though, without any allusion to it previously in the conversation, “Everybody has a gift. You have to find your passion, your gift. Everybody has a gift.” This was so incredibly true! Climbing has turned out to be the magic for me! This guy is going to find something he’s extremely good at that makes him happy!
These gifts and passions, though, are seldom what we expect them to be. If you had asked me prior to 30 Apr 2016 if I was going to become a rock climber and have it become my lifestyle with a potential job component in the route setting realm developing, I would’ve said you were out of your mind! I would’ve thought you were poking fun at me or joking! 🙃 Life is great that way, though. The hard times in between before you find your gifts and passions (hopefully someone in your life, or several someones, helps guide you toward these somehow) can be heart-breaking. Most of the time, we find our gifts and passions on our way out of heartbreak and sorrow. Just a cruel fact that I’ve observed too many times, and experienced myself. Was it worth all the sorrow and heartbreak to find it? Was it worth all the grueling work to dig myself out of a deep hole, stand up, brush myself off, and go for it all out? ABSOLUTELY!!! This is the happiest I’ve been in almost 20 years! Rock climbing!!! Who knew?!
So, to anyone out there who feels like they’re banging their head against a brick wall and getting nowhere, feeling miserable while doing it, I want to repeat what my manager friend said. EVERYBODY HAS A GIFT! Your mission in life is to FIND IT AND EXPERIENCE HAPPINESS!!!